All anyone spoke about today was The Queue. 

By early Friday morning, the line of people waiting to see the Queen lying in state was five miles long. 

And though you might think that a queue is just a queue and there’s nothing more to be said of it, you’d be wrong. For today, the queue was the story which even had its own live tracker.

 Like every great story, the tale had its own heroes and villains. 

The heroes of the day were undoubtedly footballer David Beckham and TV presenter Susanna Reid, who queued for 12 and 7 hours respectively, representing the very best of Britain’s obsession with the queue; steadfast, determined to see it through, and particularly impressive because, one suspects, as celebrities they could have pulled a favour and jumped the queue. 

Among the villains were TV presenters, Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby, who chose to do just that and avoid the queuing. MPs were also allowed to skip the queue as well, and what’s more, each bring four guests along too.  

GB News presenter, Dan Wootton, got particularly upset. He wrote angrily on Twitter, “The queue jumping of the Elizabeth line by the elite is a disgrace.”

If there’s one thing the Brits don’t like, it’s a queue jumper. An orderly queue, we tell ourselves, is more or less the most British thing there is. As the words of the famous poem almost read: “Play up! Play up! And join the queue!” 

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