Advent is upon us. And naturally, Brexit is at the forefront of everyone’s minds. Reaction has put together a gift guide to help you and your loved ones properly celebrate the season!
For the Hard Brexit ERGer in your life
Remember the trouble caused – mainly to themselves – by the ERGers in November? So for the ERGer in your life, who may have been instrumental in the failed attempt to gather 48 letters of no confidence in Theresa May, consider the following options:
Luxury Wrendale Letter Writing Set – £6.89, Amazon.
Guaranteed distribution to willing participants in ERG antics. Warning, may not contain stamps, paper, or envelopes.
The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene – a steal at only £10.60 on Amazon.
“Law 3: Conceal your intentions.”
“Law 4: Always say less than necessary.”
Fun and informative!
Anything really, in the quantity of 48.
For Theresa May
No one is more in need of a good holiday than Theresa May. Celebrate the PM’s admirable stoicism with the following options:
Deal or No Deal Interactive Game (Starring Noel Edmonds) – no need to break the bank with this one either, at just £4.23 on Amazon.
Large bottle of gin.
“Nothing has changed” t-shirt, £48.
For Stephen Barclay MP, Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union
A premium job-seekers subscription to LinkedIn – £24.98 a month.
It’s not cheap, but based on the fate of his predecessors it will establish the buyer as a thoughtful friend who expresses concern for potential future colleagues and employers. Interests: staying in office.
For Boris Johnson
How To Lose Friends And Alienate People (DVD)  – £5.01, Amazon.
Shakespeare, a beginners guide. What every bard biographer writing at speed needs.
For the Second Referendum fanatic in your life
British Politics For Dummies, Paperback. Buy used at £5.08 from Amazon.
A new EU beret. Old one worn out.
For Jeremy Corbyn
It’s been an interesting year for the Labour leader at PMQs. Theresa May is hardly a superstar, and the government she sort of runs is in ruins, but week in week out she has managed to get away with a less than stellar performance by sheer virtue of Corbyn’s ineptitude. Consider the following for the leader of the opposition to keep on his person at all times:
A Pocket Guide to Public Speaking by Dan O’Hair – £26.80 for the spiral bound version, Amazon.
Jeremy has also had trouble deciding when, or whether, to come out for a second referendum on Brexit.
So how about buying him a decision maker? (Warning device may malfunction, or be stuck in the warehouse alongside the magic technology that hard Brexiteers say will solve the Irish border question, or device may not even exist.)
If you are a Brexit voter getting Jeremy a Christmas present, how about buying him a bloody large drink to say thank you for him being (secretly) such a good Brexiteer determined to leave as his guru Tony Benn always told him to.
For the confused British voter
A nice box of chocolates and an apology.