Have you had the call to join the Government of National Unity (GNU) yet? My mobile telephone has been playing up in recent days, which may explain why I have not – at the time of writing – received a summons from Heidi Allen or Dominic Grieve, both former Conservative MPs and the leaders of the audacious bid to unite Britain this autumn. They plan to achieve this by sacking Boris Johnson as Prime Minister, setting aside the result of the 2016 referendum, and establishing a cross party administration to halt Brexit. What could possibly go wrong?
There may be other reasons, wholly unrelated to poor mobile telephone reception, that explain why I have not had the call to join, of course. The country is already in enough trouble. Do we need me involved in running things? No.