A personal view from Ian Stewart, Deloitte’s Chief Economist in the UK. To subscribe and/or view previous editions just Google ‘Deloitte Monday Briefing’.

Here, to mark the start of the Christmas week, are 12 of our “And finally” news stories from the Monday Briefing in 2021. The Monday Briefing is taking a break until Monday, 10 January. In the meantime, the Deloitte Economics team wishes you a merry Christmas and a happy New Year.

* London resident Russell Jones spent over £300 on vet fees after noticing his dog had developed a pronounced limp in one of its legs. After a thorough examination, it transpired that the dog named Bill was in good health but was imitating the limp of his owner who had a leg in plaster – crying wolf.

* Government clerks in Taiwan have issued a plea for people to stop changing their name to ‘Salmon’ after a restaurant offered free all-you-can-eat sushi to anyone with the name Gui Yu (Salmon) on their ID card – making it of-fish-cial.

* David Knight was confused to receive a fine for driving his car (registration KN19 TER) in a bus lane in Bath, some 120 miles from his home. On inspection of the CCTV evidence supplied by Bath and North East Somerset Council, it transpired that a woman wearing a T-shirt with “KNITTER” written on it had wrongly triggered the automated fine – Knit rider.

* A police officer in Glasgow called for backup recently fearing that she was being pursued for miles by a drone. Despite her best attempts at evasive driving she was unable to “lose” the object. After returning to the station it was pointed out to the junior officer that the object was in fact Jupiter, which often shines brightly on a clear night – life on mars.

* A restaurant in Toronto has renamed much of its menu after office supplies in the hope that its customers will be able to expense their meals. One burger has been renamed to ‘mini dry erase whiteboard’, a side of chips is now a ‘braided HDMI cord’ and a ginger beer is now ‘yellow lined sticky notes’ – staple foods.

* The Cîteaux Abbey, a monastery in Burgundy, France has launched an emergency cheese sale online after having to close its shop and restaurant due to the pandemic. Brother Jean-Claude was quoted as saying: “We tried explaining to our 75 cows that they needed to produce less milk but they don’t seem to have understood”, leaving the monastery with 2.8 tonnes of cheese to shift – grate depression.

* A former mafioso was apprehended by police in the Dominican Republic after someone spotted his distinctive tattoos on videos he posted on YouTube showcasing his Italian cooking. Italian prosecutors had been hunting for Mr Biart for over five years – the sauce cannot be named for legal reasons.

* A Taiwanese man has successfully sued his employer for 32 days of marriage leave after marrying his wife four times and divorcing her three times. Under Taiwanese law a worker is entitled to eight days of paid leave following their marriage – four weddings and a tribunal.

* Following a burglary at a bakery in Milwaukee, owners Karen and Krieg helped police identify a suspect caught on CCTV by printing his face on iced cookies available at the store. Following a strong response on social media, the suspect was found – baking and entering.

* Swiss researchers have been investigating whether playing music to cheese while it is ageing improves its flavour. They found that the wheel of Emmental exposed to the music of American hip-hop group A Tribe Called Quest developed the best texture, taste and appearance – Straight Outta Comté.

* A prison guard from South Carolina was fired and arrested after trying to smuggle prescription drugs into a women’s prison by hiding them in Rice Krispie Treats – snap, crackle, pot.

* Reuters reported last week that the lockdown closure of the Cuban National Zoo resulted in a bumper crop of baby animals as some of the endangered and rare species there took advantage of the lockdown peace and quiet to pursue romantic encounters – having a giraffe.