Labour’s civil war will not be concluding any time soon. Central management in Southside has barred the Socialist Appeal, the weekly Marxist newspaper, from attending this weekend’s party conference in Brighton.

Iain Hodson, leader of the Bakers, Food and Allied Workers’ Union (BFAWU), tweeted the news earlier this afternoon, questioning why the Appeal was banned when other publications – like “the S@#” (he means The Sun, by the way) – weren’t.

Sir Keir Starmer has been on collision course with left-wing hardliners for quite some time now after suspending Jeremy Corbyn and vowing to stamp out “toxic extremism” by expelling more than 1,000 members.

Funny that, because there was once a time when the Labour leader had pledged to bring the party together in the spirit of unity. It must have been lost in translation. He probably meant a united front against the far-left.

Starmer has realised that he has no time to waste in moving on from internal party rows and that he must prove the Labour Party is a credible option for government. Which is why he attempted to define exactly what it is he stands for by penning a 14,000-word essay… containing no new policies.