There is great unrest in ministerial ranks both in government and among their front bench shadows in the opposition.

The County Durham police investigation may force Labour to choose a new leader and deputy leader before the summer break. Sue Gray’s report could yet do for Boris Johnson. If it doesn’t the Prime Minister has long delayed a reshuffle “to strengthen his position”.

Meanwhile, the transparent posturing by hopefuls, with Liz Truss, Ben Wallace and Jeremy Hunt in starring roles, suggests that senior Conservative colleagues aren’t betting on the “greased piglet” evading an apple in the mouth this time.

Change is on the way: time then for our own game of Fantasy Cabinets, my rules. This is not the desultory task facing whoever is still leading the main parties later this year to build cabinets from the palpably less-than-talented pools on offer. A mere smattering of those currently striving would make it into the dream team I am going to assemble drawing on the frontbenchers who’ve held the jobs, or positions adjacent to them, over the past forty years while I’ve been covering Westminster.

Mine will be a non-partisan list from all sides from Thatcher onwards, made up of individuals who, in my opinion, did a good job both governing and administering at home, and earning respect abroad. Since the best Premier League teams now boast “full squads” capable of fielding two separate starting elevens, I’m going to nominate two people for each job.